


A poorly written, very stupid ending to ghosts. Written in August when I hadn’t slept for a couple of days

by TheEternalCowboy



Category: Ghosts (TV 2019)
Genre: But I on the other wand was not, For some peculiar reason I’ve made Mary and kitty lesbians, I even included the plague victims, I still don’t know what I’m doing bro, Major shit post, enjoy, i had to make a few names, imagine being creative, it unlike Gerard Way is okay, look I was sleep deprived, so I called some of them WWDITS characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:55:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26824747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEternalCowboy/pseuds/TheEternalCowboy
Summary: I wrote this when I should have been sleeping and I think you can tell that. I’m sorry for any SPAG errors.
Kudos: 13





	A poorly written, very stupid ending to ghosts. Written in August when I hadn’t slept for a couple of days

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this when I should have been sleeping and I think you can tell that. I’m sorry for any SPAG errors.

My ending to ghosts

Alison’s last day was spent talking to her husband and cursing the ghosts that can’t seem to leave her alone for more then ten minutes.  
“Can you guys leave me alone for a bit please? I have stuff I need to do.” Alison asked after rounding them up

Only two people weren’t in the library, Julian and Robin. They stood just round the corner waiting for Alison to walk out so they could scare her. Back in the library she was now having to answer the questions they all had.

“Ooo what are you doing? Anything we can help you with?” Pat asked as cheery as ever.  
“Your dead. You have no purpose what so ever.” She replied  
They were all taken back a little by that.

Alison decided that would be the right time to leave the room and as she turned into the hallway both robin and Julian jumped out causing Alison to tumble down the stairs. By tumble I mean fall, fall very hard. Mike came running to her aid to make sure she was okay but it was to late. She died. 

“I can’t believe you two! You’ve bloody killed me! I wouldn’t have minded as much if you killed mike because I probably would have still seen him everyday but me?” Alison shouted

“Alison, my love, you have finally realised that I am far better than that thing you call a man and chose to join me! Your one true love!” Thomas said  
“Alison! This means we can have proper sleepovers now and we can have them all the time!” Kitty said way too happily.

“Oh good god.” She muttered 

The only people that would show emotion the day she died was herself and Mike. He cried for days on end, he would talk to the air in the hoping Alison was there and could hear him. Alison hated it when mike cried, it made her cry when he did and it made her cry when Mike joined them. Mike made it his job to make button house a hotel but had an accident when he was trying to fix the boiler. Without Alison there to translate for him he didn’t know what the plague ghosts were saying and youtube wasn’t teaching him anything. The inevitable happened and mike gassed the house and was reunited with his wife about five years after she had died. When Mike had stayed and not ascended Thomas tried drowning himself in the lake for a few weeks(months). 

“God, being a ghost is boring.” Mike said

They all turned to look at him.

“Your telling me!” Robin exclaimed

And because robins reply was so funny, they all fell over laughing and a big old angel came down and said:  
“Well done! You have all finally cracked it, you lot needed each other. Your all a family whether you like or not and without each other would have been here for a very very long time. Each of you have qualities that make you who you are. No matter what you may or may not have done in life you all made it this far and that is the main thing. Your all sticking together no matter what one ghost may have done to the other. Robin, you died when a large beast chased you down and when you realised you were dead you made it your job to help the others pass on and you did. Now it is your turn. Humphrey you were wrongly beheaded and have had spend hundreds of years on the floor waiting for the other half of you. You waited for your time and it has finally come. Mary, you were burned to death because society didn’t like you or the way you talked or the way you refused to marry a man. You did no wrong and died knowing that. The people that had you killed are now with the devil and you will go where you belong. You will be with family and the woman you devoted yourself to. Kitty, the beam of light in a world of darkness and evil. You have done nothing wrong so will join us in going up.” At this moment Julian could be heard saying ‘going up what’ with a smirk across his face. “Well Julian you can go up whatever you want because apparently Satan doesn’t want you and also because your wife is up with us. Thomas, you reckless fool. You got yourself shot because you couldn’t keep it in your pants. You were killed when Lord Byron found you with his mistress and you challenged him to duel in a ploy to get the woman you thought you deserved. You will be joining us but only because when you died the world couldn’t read your dreadful poetry. Theodore you spent your life doubting yourself, thinking everything you did was wrong. You were denied happiness and love by the world. The only wrong you did was deny yourself freedom. You had the opportunity to express yourself without being caught and you know that and yet you didn’t because you were an army man. You saw yourself as a sinner because you loved a man, you loved a man who loved you back and wanted to spend the rest of his life with you but you were taken from him. The world found out about your love and the only people that thought you were sinners were the silly little people who outlawed and disliked homosexuality. In our eyes that wasn’t wrong. There is no doubt that you will join us. Like there is no doubt Alison, Mike and Pat will join us. They were innocent souls taken by the stupidity of others. Alison killed because two fellow ghosts jumped out causing her to fall, Mike killed by the idiots who made a video titled ‘how to fix a boiler’ that only showed you how to gas a house. Pat killed by some children who had no clue what they were doing. Fanny, it’s difficult with you as all you have done is pester people and insult them. You died because of bad timing and your husband being a no good cheat. I forgive you for all you have done and so you shall join us.” 

A bright white light shone above them all, Robin was first to go he went up and his name could be heard. He was finally with his family. Humphrey went up and as he did his head joined back to his body. After taking a few steps he realised his head hadn’t fallen off and when he touched his neck his head wouldn’t budge. Mary and Kitty had went up together. Those two had been in love since the laid their eyes on each other. Kitty was the woman Mary devoted herself too. Thomas went next and not a single word from him. Tears left his eyes. For the first time ever he had seen his mother. He met her and he was confronted by Byron, who just hugged him. He apologised for everything and so did Thomas. Julian made his way up next. When he got there he saw Margot. They stood staring at each other. It was no secret Julian had died screwing Margot’s brother. Not a word from either of them.  
“Julian talk her.” Robin said to him. No one could watch those two stare at each other.

“Margot.” Julian said obviously feeling guilty  
“Julian.” She replied choking on her words.  
“I love you.”  
“Do you?”  
“Yes!”  
“Really?” Margot said tears running down her face.  
“Of course.” He replied without a doubt in his mind.

Margot ran over to him, she looked him in the eyes and said:  
“I love you too.” She whispered

He pulled her into a delicate hug knowing this wouldn’t be the end of it. He would eventually get questions and he would be ready to answer them. He let that thought go as he started to cry, tears were running down his face. How could this woman still love him after all he had done to her. He cheated and left her in times of need to go of on business. Even when she was pregnant he left her all alone. He was such a horrid man and yet he was where the good people were meant to go. Margot hugged him tighter before releasing him. She looked up at him and saw the emotion on the mans face. It was so unfitting. Margot linked her arm with Julians and they walked over to Robin.

Fanny and The captain looked at each other. Both waiting for the other to leave.

“Ladies first.” The captain insisted.  
“Thank you.” Fanny replied.

As Fanny rose up she waited for someone to appear, no one did. There was no one here for her none of her children and certainly not George. She waited a little longer and when no one appeared she started to cry. She sobbed and Kitty came running over to her:  
“Oh Fanny, don’t cry. I’m here for you. I know you don’t see us as friends but I’m here.” Kitty said to her  
“Me here too.” Robin grunted.  
“We are all here for yous. Yous may have beens rude tos us but wes still cares.” Mary reassured. 

Fanny was grateful for these people. These wonderful people that stayed with her even when she insulted them.

“Of you go then Pat.” Cap stated  
“No, no you go I need to make sure everyone makes it up safely.” Pat replied.  
“It’s not your responsibility. I’m commanding officer and therefore should be the one to make sure everyone leave safely.” The captain insisted  
Pat looked to Alison and Mike and they both nodded and he made his way up. 

Only one person came running to him and that one person was his father. Pat broke down in tears as he held his dad in a tight embrace. His mother wasn’t there and he knew exactly why. The first thing his father said to him was sorry. He was sorry for everything his mother had done when he wasn’t there and how his mother treated him when he had died. Pats dad had died when he Pat was young and his mother had started abusing him and called him a monster if he said something she didn’t like. That was a habit pat had kept. He called himself a monster if he did something wrong and when left alone he replayed his life with his mother and ended up realising how worthless he was to her. 

“Alison, Mike please go.” The captain said.  
“You sure mate?” Mike asked  
“I’m sure, go on.” Cap replied.

Alison and Mike both went into the seemingly magic white hole and when they got up there Alisons grandmother and father were sat there waiting for her arrival as did Mike’s grandparents. It had turned out that the grandparents had been watching over the two of them and knew it was only right that the two couples meet before they see their beloved grandchildren again. The two families got on very well. Alison introduces everyone to the ghosts except for the Captain who hasn’t actually joined them yet. 

“I’m gonna call the Captain and see where he’s got too.” Alison announced

Everyone said okay.

“Cap?! Cap?! Where are you?” Alison said as she stuck her head down a hole. “Come on Cap! You deserve to join us! You thought for the country!” 

The Captain wouldn’t budge he refused to believe that he, a homosexual, would make it past the pearly gates of heaven. Even if he did, he wouldn’t have anyone there for him. His family disowned him when they found out and there was no one who ever truly loved him so what would be the point? 

“Alison?” The cap said barely above a whisper

“Yes, Cap?” Alison replied.

“I’m.....im nervous. What if there’s no one there and I have to carry on being alone whilst everyone gets to prance around with their partners and family!” The cap said now being louder then whispering.

“Look Cap, I don’t know your history, I don’t know who you’ve loved or who you haven’t but just know that it doesn’t matter. It’s a major misconception in the bible. People think it was “man shall not lie with man as he does women” but in reality it was “man shall not lie with boy as he does women” and that’s referring to pedophilia. Because pedophilia is what? Absolutely disgusting and is not and never will be a part of the LGBTQ+ community. No matter how hard they try to make there vulgar behaviour okay, pedophilia will always be wrong. Your supposed mental age does not mean you can fuck a four year old cause your wife doesn’t love you and no lady of the night will touch you. 

Cap. You have nothing to worry about, if there isn’t anyone up there for you then so fucking what. You have us. You have me, you have pat, Julian, robin, Mike, fanny, Mary, kitty, Thomas even the ruddy plague people. You have absolutely nothing to fear! 

Just think if Julian Foreskin can get into heaven then you definitely can! Come on, join us, please.” Alison said ranting a little about pedophilia trying to become part of the LGBT community when quite frankly its not and will never be. 

“Alison. I must thank you for everything you have done for me. You’ve helped me realise that me being attracted to men is okay and that I can’t let my old ways control everything I do. You helped me realise that long ago, your helping me realise that I can move on and that it’s nothing to be getting myself into a state over. I thank you and I would just like to alert you of one thing before I join you and the others.” Cap said

“Yes?” Alison questioned

“Your husband is... oh what’s the bally word? Oh right yeah, your husband is banging!” Cap said going a little red in the face.

“Cap.”

“Yes”

“I know that. That’s why I married him.” 

“He’s make a jolly good soldier.” 

“Oh I know, I got him to dress up as one but that’s a very different story. Come on now”

Alison others her hand down to the Captain and she pulled him up. 

So this is what it’s like he thought to himself, I wonder if there is anyone waiting for me. The Captain stood there, waiting for someone and sure as ever someone did. His old Lieutenant, William Havers. Cap looked up and saw the man he once loved standing before him, there faces were inches away from each other. God this lighting made him look very good cap thought to himself. 

“Sir, I hate to be unprofessional but-“ Havers started to say but was interrupted by the Captain, his Captain kissing him. It was nothing chaste it was just enough to be... well....enough. 

“Oh William dear do me a favour and stop nattering on about professionalism, we’re dead! We can do whatever we want. Mor lever, we can do WHO ever we want” the Captain said, whispering the last bit into Havers ear.

“Oh sir!” Havers said pretending to be shocked.

“Everyone I have announcement to make!” The Captain said in his usual loud way

“I would like to tell you all that I love a man. I always have and I believe I always shall, this man is standing next to me. His name is William Havers and I hope to take his last name one day. I shall become Theodore Havers. A new name, a new family!” The Captain said turning to William. 

“Teddy, my love, my darling. I need to tell you something that I never thought I could admit, never thought I would admit. But it seems today is the day. Theodore Captain I, William Havers, love you!” William said to the world (heaven place) 

At that everyone cheered. The Captain no longer having to repress any emotion, the Captain not having watch what he says for fear of being caught. He could finally embrace who he wanted to be and who he should be. Now he’s where he wants to be and who he wants to be and doing what he always said he would but he feels like he as won, he knows he has won. 

“ I, Theodore Captain, love you, William Havers, too!” The Captain shouted

The only people that remained at button house where the plague ghosts. Or as they preferred to be knows as: Nigel, Mick, Geoff, lily, Gemma, Collins, Nadja, Nandor, Jackie etc. They all came up to find a glowy magic portal that they all went through and found that all the things signifying they had the plague was gone and they were in heaven, it’s just like they thought it would be and then even more! They were all happy to have finally moved on.

They all were. Every single ghost. Happy to finally see what was in store for them and happy to finally be out of that bloody house.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes maybe I did change the names of Caps partner to William Havers but I had to and also my original name sucked. I hope you enjoyed this shit show and thank you for reading this. It’d probably the most I’ve ever written fan fiction wise.


End file.
